Table of contents:
- Why is my partner joking too far?
- What if the partner likes to joke too much?
- 1. Speak firmly
- 2. Do not immediately reprimand your partner in front of other people
- 3. Leave your partner
Laughter and humor is one of the keys to the longevity of a relationship. In fact, someone who is humorous is lined up as a characteristic of the ideal partner. But sometimes, your partner might like to joke around to the point of going overboard because they think of you as their closest person. His intentions may be good, just to make you laugh, but it is not uncommon for you to become offended by it.
Everyone's tolerance for being the subject of a joke is different, and what he or she perceives as humor is not necessarily funny to us. Especially if it comes to making personal and sensitive topics a laughing stock. If your partner's joking style is too much and it hurts your heart, what should we do?
Why is my partner joking too far?
Joking with your partner is one form quality time to spend time together. According to Alexandra Solomon Ph.D, assistant lecturer in marriage and family therapy at Northwestern University, joking can strengthen the bond between you and your partner.
Joking can be a way for both of you to be yourself, to come up with personal jokes and silly characters that only the two of you have. Joking can also build mutual trust by making the two of you accept each other's shortcomings through things that you think are strange, but jokes can be funny.
On the other hand, there are many reasons why couples love to joke too much. He may think the joke is funny, but it is not for you to be the "tail". In some cases, his jokes can be a sign that he wants to make the hangout atmosphere even more exciting but has done so wrongly that he can end up sacrificing you.
Some people may want to be the center of attention by taking over the conversation. For example, a joke of hers may sound "trite" to you but not to other people who have just heard of it. From there the partner gets a new sensation of satisfaction.
In addition, the purpose of the partner who likes to joke too may be because it is to shift the focus of the conversation on other people, not on him. This could be a sign that he is having problems with himself.
What if the partner likes to joke too much?
A good joke is what can reflect how well you know your partner. But sometimes when you get carried away, your partner's joke may feel a little like scorn or insinuation that makes you hurt.
Misunderstandings like this often occur and can have a negative impact on relationships if solutions are not sought.
1. Speak firmly
If you really don't like the jokes that go too far, be honest. This is the most appropriate way to start to dampen the act that is uncomfortable for you.
Say it as firmly as, “Why are you kidding like was that in front of friends? " Likely he would say that it was just a joke.
But then you can emphasize it again to make it clear that you mean, "I am ng no I like you to joke like that in front of other people. Your joke is not appropriate and hurts my feeling."
Strictly speaking here is not the meaning of it grumble or cranky . It is important to remember that when you feel hurt by your partner's words, don't respond with more mean words, scolding, explosive emotions, and even swearing. Hold on to your emotions as that will only make the atmosphere hotter and more complicated to resolve.
Keep your grievances calm and clear as possible without cornering or judging your partner.
The point is to explain that you really don't like the way your partner likes to joke too far.
2. Do not immediately reprimand your partner in front of other people
Even if your inflamed heart is used as a joke by your partner, don't immediately reprimand him in public. Especially if these people are among those closest to them, or those who are respected or respected by their partners.
Resist the urge to reprimand your partner until you have a special time together. Correcting it directly in front of the crowd will make the two of you look like a couple who are not compact or harmonious.
After all, this would lead to another problem. One of them your partner will be labeled as unethical and can not keep his talk.
3. Leave your partner
If your partner doesn't stop teasing after you get criticized, or if the jokes get worse, this could be a sign of emotional abuse.
There is a limit to a person's level of patience. If after various ways your partner still likes to joke too far, you have the right to choose.
Choose to continue living with a partner who makes you hurt feelings, or to leave for a more peaceful mind and better psychological stability.