Dating violence can be prevented with these 4 simple tips

Violence between lovebirds does not only occur in the household. Although bitter to hear, dating violence is no longer a new phenomenon in this country. Most of them are rooted in blind jealousy and unfounded possessiveness, and then there are slaps and a shower of swear words. It is also possible that violence in dating can end up in the act of rape.

Even though dating is not bound by official law, that doesn't mean we can tolerate violence in it. Here's what you can do to prevent dating violence.

The key to preventing dating violence is within you

1. Know and be aware that violence can occur during courtship

In fact, many people experience dating violence, but not all of them realize that they are actually victims. There are a number of things that underlie this. Most people choose to nrimo Just abuse her boyfriend out of fear of losing, or feeling confident that she can change her "bad habits and temperament" for the better.

Many also do not realize that they are victims of abusive relationships because basically they do not know that violence can occur while dating. There are many forms of violence that may occur, ranging from physical, verbal, emotional, to sexual abuse. Violence can happen to anyone, anywhere. In fact, most cases of domestic violence are committed by the people closest to the victim.

• Physical violence, for example kicking, pushing, slapping, punching, pulling, grabbing, hitting, threatening to use sharp weapons.
• Emotional abuse, for example degrading self-esteem, using embarrassing calls, demeaning yourself, yelling at, taunting, manipulating, publicly humiliating you, defaming, derogatory comments, making restrictive and unreasonable rules, limiting your relationships with people others, to show possessive attitudes.
• Sexual violence, for example forcing / threatening sex, committing sexual harassment, blackmailing to get sensual photos, distributing sensual photos, and many others.

2. Recognize the early signs of dating violence

Not only do you have to know the form of violence, you also have to recognize the various early signs of dating violence. That way you will be more alert. Here are the signs:

• The partner looks very aggressive
• Your partner can't control their emotions, even when they spend time with you
• Your partner shows rapid mood changes, for example, before he was angry with you, then he immediately changed to be kind and super romantic.
• Tend to force and manipulate you to do everything he wants.

3. Find someone to talk to who can be trusted

If there are problems or things that are stuck, don't hesitate to find someone to talk to. If you and your partner are in trouble or have a fight over something, don't hesitate to tell it to someone you trust.

Listening to outsiders will give you new insights into the solution you are looking for. Confide in also lets you share your emotions and not suppress them yourself. In addition, there will be other people who know the condition of your love at that time. So if one day something untoward happens, you can rely on that person as first aid.

4. If necessary, take your partner to a psychologist

In some cases, their violent tendencies can be overcome through consulting a professional counselor. The reason is, your boyfriend's abusive tendency could have come from his childhood trauma. If you want to stay serious about your relationship with him, you can ask your partner to see a psychologist to correct their abusive behavior.

Of course this is not always easy to do. You have to be careful when you ask your boyfriend. Maybe, you can also ask family or closest friends to persuade him. But of course this does not apply to all cases.

When to get out of this dangerous relationship?

If you suspect or even have experienced one or more of the above forms of violence, and have done various ways to ask it to stop but it doesn't work, it's best to end the relationship immediately before it's too late.

While this may sound like the obvious thing to do, many victims do not realize that they deserve to be treated with respect, and are therefore not demanding their rights.

Also, consider what you are willing to do for him or her? What are you really not going to do? Make sure you adapt this request to your personal well-being and your own principles.

Don't agree to do simple things to just keep the peace or save a risky relationship. Especially if you already know deep down it's not right for you.