8 Traits

Physical violence such as domestic violence and violence in dating to sexual violence such as rape are easier to recognize because they usually leave visible scars. This is different from emotional abuse, which is often underestimated because the signs and symptoms are "unclear". Even so, the effects of emotional abuse in a relationship can be much more dangerous than physical violence, you know! Moreover, their actions are often not recognized by the perpetrators and even the victims.

What constitutes emotional abuse?

Emotional violence is a type of violence that includes verbal attacks and is manifested indirectly through manipulative behavior. For example, belittling or belittling, scolding, threatening, intimidating, excessive possessiveness, or even totally ignoring you.

Unlike physical violence or sexual abuse, emotional abuse in relationships is more subtle and often confuses the victim. The doer in the beginning can do a variety of ways to make you trust him wholeheartedly. Once his manipulation tactics have succeeded in destroying your perceptions and confidence in yourself as a victim, then he will take action.

Signs of emotional abuse in a relationship

Victims of emotional abuse are generally unaware that they have been targeted because they are not visible. But make no mistake. Although invisible, the effects of emotional abuse can be even more devastating. Starting from tarnishing self-esteem and self-confidence to severe PTSD trauma, depression, and suicide.

That's why it's important to detect as early as possible signs of emotional abuse that may occur in your relationship.

1. Often blame

“Just like that, how come it can go wrong, anyway! I've already said.."

“Don't be silly! I mean not like that!"

"You're making it up. It never happened."

Have you ever come out of your partner's mouth? If so, chances are that your partner is using a subtle manipulation tactic known as gaslighting. The perpetrator will continue to insist on twisting the facts so that the victim will start to doubt the truth of his own version.

If your partner often puts you down and twists the facts so that you seem like an irrational person and have lost your mind, this is a danger signal that you are experiencing emotional abuse.

2. Possessive

Everyone certainly wants to be noticed by their partner. However, if this is done so excessively that it allows your partner to be possessive, then this is not good for your relationship.

"You have to inform me every day, huh."

"Where are you? With anyone?"

"Don't go with that guy friend, I don't like it."

Because of his possessiveness, some people ask their partners to provide passwords for all their social media accounts. He said, this aims to prevent infidelity. Once he finds out that you are out with a friend of the opposite sex, your partner will get furious and immediately blame you.

Jealousy is normal, but with a note that it is still within reasonable limits. Being overly possessive and jealous can actually lead to your partner being rude towards you.

3. Saying words that are hurtful, but are considered as joking material

Nothing hurts more than when you have negative words to say, especially from your partner. For example, he often calls you negative calls like “stupid” or “weird” in front of your friends.

Especially if when you tell him to stop, he immediately denies or underestimates it with “Ah, I'm just kidding. You shouldn't be too sensitive, okay."

Be careful, this bad attitude is already harassing you emotionally, you know.

4. You must apologize, but you were not wrong

Keep in mind that emotional abusers are often manipulative. This means that your partner deliberately belittles you, makes you helpless, and puts you in the blame so that you keep apologizing. For example, by saying something like, “Are you nagging for such a trivial thing? Seriously!"

Yes, this is one of the emotional violence that should be watched out for. If you do realize that you have done something wrong, then of course apologizing is the right step. However, if you are absolutely sure that you are not wrong, have evidence of it, and these unwarranted accusations keep happening, consider ending the relationship.

5. Your partner is always not there for you

At first, your partner will be sweet and romantic by giving flowers or things that you like. Nothing but, this aims to make you believe that he loves you. Once you get into the 'game', your partner will start to be manipulative and verbally abusive.

Again, he will argue that this is a form of affection for you. Without realizing it, you will start to blame yourself for accusing you of nonsense.

6. Underestimating

If every time a discussion or fight, he ends the conversation by silencing or refusing to listen to you so that it makes you helpless and appreciated, this is a signal for you to end the relationship.

Or vice versa, if your partner is constantly demeaning your dignity and self-confidence. For example, you just won an essay writing contest or your boss's office project just scored.

Instead of congratulating and encouraging, a partner is abusive it will underestimate you. "No wonder you won. The least number of participants, right small in scope."

This of course will lower your self-esteem. In fact, support from your partner certainly means a lot to foster your self-confidence.

7. Threatening

This sign of emotional abuse is clear. If your partner starts threatening to take over all the important things in your life, from your money, your house, even your children, this is a red flag.

The form of the threat can vary. Whether it's a threat to leave you, reveal your secrets, and so on.

Indirectly, you will be forced to continue to depend on your partner. Instead of deepening the relationship, this inner stress is not good for your emotional health.

8. Isolate

That couple abusive and frequent emotional abuse will usually distance you from your family and friends in various ways. Again, this is so that you can only depend on it.

As a result, your partner can act arbitrarily and emotionally abuse you more freely. The easier it is for you to be separated from those closest to you, the more difficult it will be for you to get out of this unhealthy relationship.