Table of contents:
- Having sex after giving birth, what needs attention?
- 1. Decreased sex drive
- 2. The vagina is dry and stretchy
- 4. The stomach is still big
- 5. Breast milk may leak during orgasm
In general, the doctor will give the green light for you and your husband to have sex again after giving birth within the next four to six weeks. But this does not mean that your sex life will return to the way it was before the baby came into the world.
A mother's body will not be able to come back exactly as it was before. Although this is something that is normal, it is undeniable that physical changes can more or less make having sex after childbirth a challenge in itself. Below are some of the body changes a new mother has that can affect your sexual desire.
Having sex after giving birth, what needs attention?
1. Decreased sex drive
If you're not in the mood for sex after giving birth, you're not alone - lots of new moms are too. Because even if it's past the six weeks your doctor recommends, your body still has to recover from the postpartum physical trauma. Your hormones and emotions change dramatically, your uterus is shrinking, your caesarean section or episiotomy wound is healing, and you may be tired and overwhelmed caring for your new baby and family. In addition, the hormone estrogen, which drops sharply after childbirth, will make you lose your sex drive.
"Many women take up to a year before feeling better and ready to have sex again," says Hope Ricciotti, MD, a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Harvard Medical School and an obstetrician at Beth Israel Deaconess Hospital in Boston. WebMD.
The good news is, your sex drive will not be zero. Interest in having sex will gradually rise again as you recover - although the exact timing will vary for each person. The most important thing is to let yourself be 100 percent fit before actually getting into bed. In the meantime, you and your partner can seek intimacy through other alternatives, such as hugging, kissing, or even just watching a movie together after your little one sleeps.
2. The vagina is dry and stretchy
After giving birth, it is possible that the skin between the vagina and anus will tear or have to be cut. This is called an episiotomy, and nearly 50 percent of women giving birth will have this. But whether you have an episiotomy or not, the vagina generally feels softer and looser - and may never return to its exact shape from before pregnancy. Even women who give birth by caesarean section can experience this because the residual pregnancy hormones dilate the upper pelvic door (pelvic brim).
On the other hand, the vagina will feel drier after giving birth due to the sharp decrease in the hormone estrogen. Your estrogen levels will be even lower when you enter the breastfeeding period, which will make vaginal dryness more pronounced. The low estrogen hormone causes a low sex drive and a decreased ability of the vagina to produce natural lubricants.
It may take several months before you start to feel comfortable with your vaginal changes after giving birth. However, if you feel that something is wrong - pressure, feelings of "looseness" or persistent pain during intercourse - this could be a sign of pelvic prolapse. This is a condition that requires a doctor's attention.
Meanwhile, the best thing you can do to restore the vaginal condition is Kegel exercises which can help tighten the pelvic floor muscles and around the vagina. In addition, there is nothing wrong with using the aid of sex lubricants if you want to try to have sex again after giving birth.
4. The stomach is still big
Many women hope that after giving birth to their stomachs they will return to their normal size very soon. In fact, it takes about 6-8 weeks before the uterus shrinks back to its pre-pregnancy size. So in the meantime, your belly may still look like you're about six months pregnant.
What's more, it can take up to a year or more for your pregnant weight to lose. Plus you may still have to deal with stretch marks, scars, bigger legs, sagging breasts, and even hair loss.
Try not to think about the changes in your body that you are currently experiencing. The stress of thinking about a bad body image kills the mood for sex. Take good care of yourself and treat yourself to love and affection while you heal. Admire every accomplishment your body experiences: you carry the baby in the belly for nine months, and manage to carry it out into the world alone. Your child is in the world thanks to all your struggles. And what is more beautiful, strong, and sensual than being a mother?
5. Breast milk may leak during orgasm
Orgasm releases oxytocin, the hormone that triggers the release of breast milk, aka the letdown reflex. This is why your milk may leak (even spurt) when you and your partner have sex after giving birth. Although this can be embarrassing for you, but rest assured that the situation of leaking breast milk during orgasm is not impossible to happen even to women who have never given birth.
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