Table of contents:
- Recognize parental attitudes that make children insecure
- 1. Too meddling with children's affairs
- 2. Yelling and hitting children
- 3. Always bring up problems that are already resolved
- 4. Often makes children feel guilty
- 5. Speak harshly
What parents do and show their children will influence their character, behavior and mindset. Sometimes, unconsciously, the attitude of parents towards children is not right so that it makes children become insecure. So, why does this happen and what kind of attitude does the parent have towards the child?
Recognize parental attitudes that make children insecure
One of the important factors in building a child's self-confidence comes from the closest people, namely parents. However, sometimes the parent's attitude does not make the child tough, it actually makes the child feel insecure. Following are the attitudes of parents towards children that can unconsciously reduce the child's self-confidence, which you need to avoid.
1. Too meddling with children's affairs
The most important thing in building children's self-confidence is the trust that parents give to children. Since childhood, parents sometimes worry if they do everything themselves, including little things. At that moment, parents often interfere in the child's affairs so that he doesn't fail at the things he does.
In fact, failure is a natural thing. Children also need to know that it is normal to be sad, anxious, and angry when that failure occurs. With this failure, let the child learn to solve his own problems.
If parents interfere with the child's affairs too much, the child will feel that he is a failure and only the parents can solve the problem. The attitude of parents towards children is what can make children not confident until they grow up and will only rely on their parents whenever there is a problem.
2. Yelling and hitting children
Yelling and hitting can indeed make children more obedient and less likely to repeat negative behaviors. However, this only applies to the short term.
Parents need to remember, yelling and hitting children is showing anger and this can be debilitating for children. In fact, psychologists equate this behavior with bullying (bullying) in children.
By yelling and hitting, parents can interfere with children's ability to solve problems and resolve conflicts. This can also make children insecure until they grow up.
3. Always bring up problems that are already resolved
The relationship between parents and children is not always smooth and often faces conflicts or problems. However, when one conflict has been resolved, do not discuss it again in the next period.
Sometimes, parents forget and often discuss past mistakes of children when they are angry. If this attitude towards children continues, parents will teach children to harbor emotions and hold grudges.
Children also find it difficult to improve their behavior to be more positive. In fact, with positive behavior, children tend to be able to develop their self-confidence.
4. Often makes children feel guilty
Children often make mistakes. When this happens, sometimes parents scold and pressure the child so that the child feels guilty.
This attitude is not the right thing. By making him feel guilty, the child will feel alienated by the parent. The child will feel that he is a failure and cannot manage himself so that the attitude of the parent can actually make the child insecure.
At this moment, parents should show understanding towards their children, guide them, and tell them what might be done to overcome their mistakes.
5. Speak harshly
When parents feel angry with their children, they often speak harshly to their children. In fact, this can hurt him and make children embarrassed and feel insecure. Even speaking harshly can disturb the relationship between parent and child.
If parents realize that their attitude towards their children is wrong, try to correct them and find ways to generate self-confidence. This of course will be very good for the development of children's behavior in the future.
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