Table of contents:
- 8 ways to stay calm when you catch your partner cheating
- 1. Contact the closest person
- 2. Give yourself time and space to think
- 3. Think back to the causes of the affair
- 4. Talk with your partner
- 5. Don't take revenge
- 6. Avoid blaming your partner
- 7. Don't involve the other party
- 8. Get help from a psychologist
Who doesn't get angry, upset, and disappointed when they find out that their partner is cheating on them? You may be one of those people who would feel that way if one day you accidentally found out that your partner was in a relationship with someone else. However, that does not mean that this condition must be faced with anger. In fact, you will feel better if you can try to stay calm. However, how to stay calm when you catch your partner cheating?
8 ways to stay calm when you catch your partner cheating
It might seem impossible to deal with your cheating partner calmly. However, there are actually, you know, several ways you can practice to stay calm even if you catch your partner cheating.
1. Contact the closest person
If you accidentally catch your partner cheating, the thing you should avoid is traveling alone. Immediately contact the closest person who will provide you with support and are willing to accompany you. The reason is, sometimes the mind suddenly becomes clogged and confused so that negative ideas may appear.
At least, when someone else is with you, someone will help you think more clearly and help calm you down. That way, you can decide what steps to take next.
2. Give yourself time and space to think
When the irritation and emotions have subsided, try taking a break from your partner. There is no need to get angry even though you have caught your partner cheating and stay calm. Instead, take as much time as you need to get away from your partner for a moment.
If you live in the same house with your partner, try not to be in the same room with your partner. Your partner is obliged to give you space and time to cool off.
On the other hand, you also have the right not to think about your partner for a certain period of time, until you are really able to make the best decisions about your relationship with your partner. This time can also be used by the couple to introspect themselves about the mistakes they have done.
3. Think back to the causes of the affair
Once you feel calmer, try to think about what problems might be causing cheating in your relationship. If you are in a relationship that is still several months old and your partner has cheated on you, it will be easier for you to leave your partner.
However, if you have been with your partner for years, or you are married and have children. Then, when you catch your partner cheating, you should try to stay calm and find out the root cause of this unpleasant incident.
It could be, in fact, in your relationship both have problems that make your partner feel unappreciated, mistreated, abandoned, and much more. Although these reasons cannot be justified as reasons for cheating, at least you know what caused it.
4. Talk with your partner
When you know this, all you have to do is tell your partner what you really know. There is no need to lure your partner with various codes that he doesn't necessarily understand. Be straightforward but still calm.
Plus, when you catch your partner cheating on you, stay calm and don't rush to tell everyone, be it friends or family. Wait until you and your partner have the final say regarding the continuation of the relationship.
The reason is, if you and your partner decide to forgive him and stay together after this incident, rushing to tell family and friends that your partner is cheating on you will harm you. It could be that your relationship with an already peaceful partner becomes disturbed because friends and family lose respect for your partner.
5. Don't take revenge
If you catch your partner cheating, try to stay calm. Otherwise, the build-up of emotions can leave you unable to think long. At that time, you may want to tell everyone the meanness of your partner, or even you intend to cheat too.
In fact, taking revenge will not have a positive impact on either you or your relationship. In fact, the condition of the relationship will be even worse. Therefore, give yourself time to determine the best steps you can take for yourself and your partner.
If you decide to forgive him, be sincere. However, if you decide to part with him, immediately heal the wound and move on with your life to be happier.
6. Avoid blaming your partner
Maybe your partner has indeed made a big mistake by cheating on you. However, that doesn't mean you have to keep blaming it. Also avoid acting like you are the only victim.
Until you really know what makes your partner want to be with other people, you shouldn't feel like this is all your partner's fault. The reason is, there could really be something wrong with the relationship you are in.
Try not to feel sorry for yourself, as this will only make you even sadder. It would be better if you try to remain neutral and calm even though you have caught your partner cheating.
7. Don't involve the other party
You must remember that relationships and problems that occur only between you and your partner. Even if you catch your partner cheating, stay calm and don't involve other people. For example, if you are married to a spouse and have children.
Avoid making children weapons or even shields for you and your partner. If necessary, don't tell your child what happened. Your partner may have hurt you, but that doesn't mean he or she is not a good parent to your child.
8. Get help from a psychologist
One way you can take is to ask a psychologist to help you calm down after catching your partner cheating. You can ask for advice from him so that you can be more neutral in dealing with this problem.
In addition, a psychologist may provide a new perspective for you so that you can better understand what might have happened to cause your partner to choose to cheat. In fact, you can also ask your partner to come with you and take counseling for couples.
People who are experts in dealing with similar problems can make it easier for you to communicate with your partner. So, even if you want to end your relationship with your partner later, you know that you have previously done your best to maintain the relationship.