Table of contents:
- What is the impact of yelling at children too often?
- 1. Yelling makes children unwilling to listen to their parents
- 2. Making children feel worthless
- 3. Shouting one form of oppression against children
- 4. Stretch out the relationship with the child
- 5. Make children do not want to respect their parents
- 6. Creating the same behavior in children in the future
- How to regulate emotions after yelling at children?
- 1. Take a deep breath
- 2. Apologize and take responsibility
- 3. Restart the conversation calmly
- 4. Avoid forcing the conversation right away
- 5. Remind the child that love him
- Tips to refrain from yelling at children
- Recognize emotions and feelings
- Talk calmly but firmly
Being a parent is not easy. There are times when you lose your temper when you face the throw-away and yell at the child with a loud tone. But remember, yelling at children is not a good way to communicate and it has an impact. What are the possible consequences if the child is yelled at too often and how to react?
What is the impact of yelling at children too often?
As children get older, their emotions will also develop. Sometimes there is just an attitude that makes you angry so that you yell at him.
However, it needs to be understood that there are consequences that must be borne by the parents when they often yell at their children, namely:
1. Yelling makes children unwilling to listen to their parents
If you think that when you yell, your child will listen more and obey what your parents say, this assumption is wrong.
In fact, one of the possible consequences when children are often yelled at is that they do not want to listen to their parents' advice.
When yelling, parents are actually activating a part of the child's brain that has a defense and resistance function.
When children hear yelling, they will get scared, fight their parents, or just run away. This can interfere with child development.
Instead of scolding him with a loud tone, try to discuss with the child when he made a mistake.
Parents will see different results in children after breaking the habit of yelling at children.
2. Making children feel worthless
Your parents may have felt that yelling at their children made them respect you more. In fact, children who are yelled at too often feel that they are worthless.
As a human being, children naturally feel like they want to be loved and appreciated, especially with those closest to them, including their parents.
Therefore, yelling too often actually has more of a negative impact on the growth and development of the little ones than the other way around.
3. Shouting one form of oppression against children
Did you know that yelling at children is a form of bullying or bullying ?
Yes, bullying does not only happen in the school environment, but can happen at home. The possible repercussions for a child who is yelled at a lot can be similar to the impact bullying.
If parents don't want their child to have poor growth and development, it's better to stop the habit of yelling when the child makes mistakes.
4. Stretch out the relationship with the child
When children are yelled at too often, one possible result is that the relationship between parent and child becomes tenuous.
As a result, children can feel sad, ashamed, and unloved. So, don't be surprised if children don't want to be too close to their parents anymore.
Moreover, if parents do not want to hear the child's reasons first.
The child can also feel that they are not understood even by their closest ones, in this case the parents.
So, avoid the habit of yelling at your children if you don't want your relationship and your baby to be tenuous.
5. Make children do not want to respect their parents
Feeling unappreciated and unloved is often the result of children being yelled at too often by parents.
The reason is, yelling at children is also a form of parents who do not respect their own children.
Therefore, the possible consequence of a child who is yelled at too often by parents is that the child is unable to show respect to his parents.
6. Creating the same behavior in children in the future
Yelling can have a negative impact on a child's psychological condition in the long run.
Quoting the Child Development Journal, children who are yelled at too often by their parents can make children do the same things as parents did when they were young.
The child will grow up to be more physically and verbally aggressive.
The reason is, when they are young, children are accustomed to seeing abusive behavior both physically and verbally from their parents as a form of problem solving.
Therefore, when they are facing a problem, the solution that comes to mind is rude behavior. This makes children when they grow up, will not hesitate to yell at others.
If the yelling is followed by hurtful or insulting words, the child will lose confidence and live in anxiety. Parents need to increase the child's self-confidence when that happens.
In addition, children who are often yelled at by their parents are more at risk of experiencing behavioral disorders and depression as a result of this childhood trauma.
How to regulate emotions after yelling at children?
If parents lose patience and are let go of yelling at their children, don't get carried away.
Refrain from yelling can prevent bad behavior from occurring in children as a result of being yelled at too often.
Here's how to regulate emotions after yelling at children:
1. Take a deep breath
After yelling or hurting your child, take at least three deep breaths.
Avoid speaking out words that make your child feel even more hurt.
When you are hit by emotions, your body becomes more tense. Signs of shortness of breath, muscle tension, heart palpitations.
Taking deep breaths can help your body relax so you can think more clearly.
2. Apologize and take responsibility
Don't be embarrassed to apologize to your children if you yell at them.
Indirectly, you are setting an example and teaching children to apologize and take responsibility for their actions.
If the parent has let go of yelling at the child, apologize to the child in a calm tone.
You can say, "I'm sorry, son. Father and Mother got carried away with that emotion and yelled at you. "
This may allow children to tolerate the mistakes their parents make, just as you can refrain from getting angry with children.
3. Restart the conversation calmly
When the parent yells, the child will not fully understand what you are saying.
So after apologizing, make sure that your emotions have subsided and offer your child to restart the conversation from scratch, without bursting into emotion or yelling.
4. Avoid forcing the conversation right away
If parents do not manage to calm down, avoid forcing yourself to finish talking with the child right away.
Take a moment to pause and determine the time you need it so that the tension between parent and child does not drag on.
For example, say that right now you are really angry and want to clean up the laundry first while calming yourself down. After that, continue talking to the child again.
5. Remind the child that love him
After being yelled at, the child will feel discouraged. So that these feelings don't drag on and become the result of being yelled at too often, parents need to let them know that you don't hate children.
It is important for parents to remind children that you love them and are just feeling tired and full of emotions.
Tips to refrain from yelling at children
The next opportunity, don't lose your temper again. Take the following steps to hold yourself back when you are at your peak.
This is quite effective so that the child does not experience behavioral disorders as a result of being yelled at too often. Here are a few ways:
Recognize emotions and feelings
Understand what turns you on a tantrum and when you start to get emotional. For example, every time you come home from work, you become more sensitive.
Be aware of this and don't use it as a justification for scolding your child. Pay attention and keep the tone of voice when speaking so as not to explode.
Talk calmly but firmly
To make sure parents don't reprimand their children excessively, a comfortable speaking position. For example, while sitting together, not standing.
Also try not to reprimand your children in front of other people, such as siblings or household assistants.
This is done so that you avoid the pressure to discipline your child too hard.
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