Why boy

At birth, all children tend to be closer to their mothers because their daily needs depend on the mother. As you get older, this can change. The stigma in society considers boys to be closer to mothers, and girls to be closer to fathers. Is this true and what might be the reasons for it?

The reason mother and son are closer

Some of the reasons that might bring boys closer to their mothers include:

1. Make children feel cared for and pampered

Every child will indeed seek support and comfort from their parents. However, whenever boys cry or make mistakes, they will choose to run and seek protection from the mother. This is because the mother figure tends to be more calming and indulgent for boys, not judging the child's mistakes.

Meanwhile, boys tend to be afraid or reluctant to approach the father figure. This may happen because boys have strong expectations. In fact, it is not uncommon for a father to impose his will on a boy. In fact, regardless of gender, both need the same affection and attention.

2. Support boys emotional intelligence

Children who are closer to their mothers are often labeled as “mama's kids” who are full of the stigma of being spoiled. However, they actually have better emotional intelligence.

Children who have strong ties to their mothers are less likely to get involved in gangs at school, abuse drugs, or engage in casual sex under age. If they get involved with problems with their friends, they will not choose to fight violently, but choose to communicate well.

Launching Mom Junction, Dr. Pasco Fearon of the School of Psychology and Clinical Language Sciences , The University of Reading, states that boys who do not have a close relationship with a mother tend to have behavior problems. In fact, this problem will still arise even after the child has grown up.

That is why boys who have strong bonds with their mothers tend to have lots of friends at school and are less at risk of depression and anxiety. This is because they are trained to be able to understand other people's feelings, to take care of themselves and to control their emotions more easily.

Until adulthood, boys will get used to respecting and appreciating women because of their close relationship with their mother.

3. Helping the development of children's psychology

The closeness of boys to mothers, especially when they are toddlers, seems to be very helpful in the growth and psychological development of children. This is because closeness to mothers can help increase boys' enthusiasm and persistence in learning new things.

In addition, boys who are close to their mothers are also easier to socialize, cooperate with, and can endure their egoism. Of course this is very helpful in the development of children's psychology, because children become good friends to friends at school.

This will have a positive impact on children's social abilities as they get older. Therefore, the closeness of sons and their birth mothers has a very important role in this matter.

Then, what are the reasons for daughters to be closer to fathers?

If the closeness of son and mother has many important roles in the growth and development of the child, what about the closeness of the daughter to the father? What are the reasons?

1. Look for an assertive person to feel protected

If boys feel more loved and protected by a mother, on the other hand, girls feel more secure and comfortable when they are with their father. This does not mean that a mother cannot protect her daughter. However, girls tend to have a calmer feeling when they are with their father.

This causes girls to learn toughness and assertiveness from the figure of a good father, rather than a mother. In addition, the closeness of the daughter to the father can also arise when the mother is more focused on the son. The reason is, girls can be jealous of the closeness possessed by mothers and sons.

Moreover, if the boy is a younger brother. Of course girls can feel the mother's love has been divided. This makes girls more likely to look for a father figure who may have more time for him while the mother is busy caring for the younger sibling.

2. Obtaining the expected response

Father figures tend to respond more to girls than boys. In addition, the closeness of the daughter to the father can help relieve her loneliness. As previously mentioned, a girl's loneliness can arise when the mother is more focused and busy taking care of the boy.

That is why girls will immediately run to their fathers when they have certain desires. For example, when a girl asks to buy a toy. Mothers usually will firmly refuse when their daughters whine. While fathers will usually immediately agree to every wish of their daughter. So, it's no wonder that girls depend more on their fathers than their mothers.

The importance of the role of mothers and fathers in educating children

Although boys tend to be closer to mothers and daughters closer to fathers, it is not appropriate for you as a parent to differentiate between children. You still have to educate children positively with your partner regardless of whether your child is a boy or a girl.

This is because poor parenting can have a negative impact on children's growth and development, especially for boys.

If boys get less attention from parents, both mother and father, this will affect changes in children's behavior. Lack of love from both father and mother causes the child to develop into an aggressive and rebellious person.

Actually, every child needs the same amount of love from a father and mother. One thing you need to remember as a parent is that the child's character and personality are different.

You may also need to approach each child differently to suit the child's love needs. Even if you are siblings, your children may have very different characters.

This should be a reference for parents to determine what parenting styles and approaches are appropriate for each child. You may also consult a doctor or child psychologist if you think your child has developmental problems, especially in their developmental psychology.

Your doctor may help you find the best solution to any problems you may face in choosing parenting styles. In fact, doctors can also determine what kind of parenting is good and in accordance with the character of the child.

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