Having sex for the first time doesn't always hurt, here are 6 tips

It doesn't matter what your background, age, or status, having sex for the first time is an experience that creates mixed feelings. For women especially, one of the things that is often worried about first sex is the pain. If the hymen is torn, surely we will feel pain, right? Is it true, having sex for the first time will always hurt? How to prevent?

Will having sex for the first time hurt?

Many women think that losing their virginity will definitely hurt. In fact, it's not always like that.

Reena Liberman, MS, a sex therapist, quoted from Her Campus, explained that having sex for the first time might feel a little uncomfortable or like a little pressure.

In some women, the first sex may tear the hymen, causing spotting to bleed during and after sex. This is only natural. Even so, not all of the hymen will tear after the first time you have sex.

Sex - whether it's for the first time or the umpteenth time - shouldn't cause excessive pain and / or bleeding. If you experience it, this may indicate a particular problem.

Then, what causes pain during sex?

The medical term for pain during sex is dyspareunia, which is defined as pain in the genitals that occurs before, during, and after sexual intercourse. If you experience unbearable pain during sex it can signal a variety of things - from physical problems to psychological worries.

In many cases, you can experience pain during intercourse for the first time if you are not “wet” enough, aka vaginal dryness due to lack of lubrication (either natural vaginal lubricants due to lack of arousal or not being helped by commercial sex lubricants).

In addition, stress, anxiety, depression, concern about physical appearance, fear of sexual intercourse, conflict in relationships, and trauma can also play a role in causing a decrease in arousal which in turn affects the production of vaginal fluids, causing discomfort or pain during sex.

Apart from the two common causes above, pain during intercourse for the first time can be caused by certain health problems such as vaginismus, vaginal yeast infection, venereal disease, endometriosis, pelvic inflammation (PID), to uterine cysts or fibroids.

Prevent pain during intercourse for the first time

Having sex on the first night can be a pleasant and very satisfying experience without pain. Here are some tips for having sex for the first time without pain:

1. Just relax

The first experience will always make you tense and nervous. Coupled with stress and worrying about whether I will succeed in orgasm for the first time. Psstt… For women, the likelihood of having an orgasm the first time you have sex is actually quite low.

Susan Ernst, a doctor at the Health Service Women's Health Clinic at the University of Michigan, says it's natural for women not to reach orgasm during sex for the first time because they weren't used to having intimate interactions with their own bodies and their partners. Says Ernst, "When women feel more comfortable with their own bodies as well as those of their partners, orgasms are more likely to occur."

Therefore, try to relax by taking a deep breath and then exhaling before you get into bed and throw away any worries that are on your mind. There will be many unexpected things that can happen during the first sex. Whatever it is, don't get your hopes up on your first night experience. Let this first sex experience go as it is.

2. Tell your partner

If you start experiencing pain during sex, stop immediately and talk to your partner. This can indicate that you are tense and nervous.

Without communication, you will find it difficult to achieve pleasure when making love. Always share your opinion with your partner about what makes you comfortable and what is not. If you feel sick, don't hesitate to tell your partner to slow down or change their movements.

3. Change sex positions

Pain during intercourse for the first time can be caused by an uncomfortable sex position or a penetration rate that is too deep, fast, or rushed. You can try to change the style of sex that is more comfortable. Suppose you are sitting on a man (woman on top) in order to better control the depth of penetration.

4. Create foreplay longer

The pain usually occurs due to premature penetration of the penis when you are not fully aroused. or not quite ready yet.

Also take more time for foreplay sessions so that you and your partner can both relax and build passion before the main action begins. Moment foreplay , You can ask your partner to touch your sensitive body parts so that they are easily aroused.

5. Use lubricants

Some women may not produce enough natural vaginal fluids, especially in menopausal women. To get around this, you can use sex lubricants. But don't just use lubricating products. Choose a lubricant product that is safe for women's health. Ask your doctor first what product is right for you.