It's hard to forget someone even though they have been rejected, why?

"Love can blind hearts and minds in an instant", this parable feels right for those whose love has been rejected, but still likes and finds it difficult to forget their idol. For those of you who have never been in this position, you may think that there is no point in getting caught up in one-sided love. However, people who are crazy about love will think the opposite.

No matter whether they have been rejected, ignored, or ignored by their idol, they still try to pursue him. It seems that this is human nature, that is, they are more interested in what they cannot have and tend to turn a blind eye to what is actually easier to get. What's the matter, really?

Already in love makes it hard to forget someone

Starting from here, Helen Fisher, a writer, anthropologist, and behavioral observer from the United States, and her team try to find out what really makes it hard for someone to forget the person who has rejected it. This study involved 10 women and 5 men who confessed their love had just been rejected, but still continued thought the figure.

Research in the Journal of Neurophysiology was carried out through brain scans. The experts asked participants to look closely at the photos of people who had rejected them, then continued by looking at several photos of people they knew but did not love.

The goal is to compare participants' brain activity when presented with photos of their loved ones and dislikes. The results also show that the human brain works more actively when seeing, imagining, or thinking about people who have long been admired.

On the other hand, they can be completely indifferent or casual when it comes to people they don't like.

Why, the hell, still love even though you've been rejected?

Researchers have several theories that explain why it is difficult for us to forget people who clearly reject our love. Among them are:

1. Curiosity

There is a special reason why many people do not give up even though they have been rejected many times from their loved ones. According to Fisher and his colleagues, this is because resistance stimulates parts of the brain associated with motivation, desire, and curiosity.

When compared to photos of people they don't like, the participants' brains appeared to be more active when faced with photos of their loved ones. Especially in the part of the brain that regulates curiosity, motivation, desire, anxiety, and pain.

Simply put, you will grow curiosity after being ignored by your loved ones. The more rejected, the more curious. Maybe this is what spurs you to continue to approach him no matter what response he gives.

2. The "addiction" factor

Another unique fact found in this study has to do with activity in the front part of the brain. This part of the brain plays a role in regulating the emotional ups and downs and addictive reactions to something.

Not much different from someone who is addicted to taking drugs, a person who has been repeatedly rejected but still finds it difficult to forget. It is like, they are really "addicted" to the love they feel. Well, the person they covet is the antidote.

The effect of this thought will make you dissolve in your own feelings, making it difficult to think clearly. Finally, whether you realize it or not, it is still difficult for you to stay away from it because you are already used to the figure that has been filling your mind, heart, and days for a long time.

3. The more rejected, the higher the value and quality of the person

The final theory is that you think that the person who rejects you has a higher score than other people. The more he refuses and stays away from you, the more difficult he will get, the more difficulty he will get.

This conclusion resembles the theory of human evolution, which explains that it is in the nature of a person to pursue the partner he thinks is the most valuable and highly valued to fill his life.

The analogy is this, you only have 5 thousand rupiah to buy a pencil. When going to the shop, there is another pencil that costs 10 thousand rupiah. Even though the function is the same, which is to write, suddenly the ten thousand rupiah pencil that you can't afford looks even more attractive. This is because you assume that expensive and unaffordable items are of better quality than cheaper and readily available items.

That's what happens when you find it hard to forget someone who has rejected your love. Increasingly rejected, the value and quality of the person seems to increase. In fact, he's not necessarily the best for you.