Table of contents:
- What is that codependent relationship?
- The signs you are in codependent relationship
- The result is in the relationship codependent too long
Have you ever felt that you have sacrificed a lot for your partner, but the rewards you get are not worth it? If you do and feel like it often, then you are most likely caught up in the so-called relationship codependent relationship . What is that?
What is that codependent relationship ?
Codependent relationship is a relationship pattern in which you depend on your partner's approval of nearly every decision you make.
For example, suppose you are willing to make sacrifices to satisfy your partner's needs by subordinating your priorities.
According to Scott Wetzler, PhD, psychologist at Albert Einstein College of Medicine , this kind of relationship is considered unhealthy. This is because one of the couples is not independent, or is considered not having a stand.
As reported from the page WebMD , this condition can arise when someone has an unpleasant childhood.
For example, you have been emotionally abused by your own parents or felt neglected as a teenager.
As a result, he feels that his wants and needs are not important. In fact, he also has difficulty recognizing his own feelings and needs.
The signs you are in codependent relationship
To find out whether you or someone closest to you is in the relationship or not, know the signs.
It might be quite difficult to tell the difference codependent relationship with clingy aka sticking around However, people who often sacrifice for the sake of their partner have several habits that are often carried out, namely:
- Not feeling satisfied or happy when you don't do something for someone else.
- Stay in a relationship with a partner who has been abusive and hurtful.
- Willing to do anything to make his partner satisfied and happy, whatever the risk.
- Feel guilty when putting their own desires first and tend to cover up what they want
As an easy example, you are willing to cancel an appointment with a friend just because your partner is lazy to come and he asks you not to go.
According to a study from the journal Addict Health, this relationship is often found in couples who are caring for drug addicts.
In the study, it was found that women who partnered with an addict made them less open-minded.
This is because these women prioritize the needs of their partners who need care over themselves.
However, keep in mind that not all couples who have husbands or wives who are addicts behave in this way.
The result is in the relationship codependent too long
Making a partner happy is something that needs to be done in a relationship.
However, it is not advisable to subordinate your own needs to making sacrifices for the sake of your partner.
If this happens, you are likely in an unhealthy relationship.
According to Shawn Burn PhD, a professor of psychology at California Polytechnic State University , codependent relationship just makes you tired quickly.
What's more, this pattern makes you neglect other important things including loving yourself.
In addition, there are several other impacts that may last a long time, such as:
- Change you who were independent to become indecisive.
- Drains feelings.
- You are at risk of developing an identity crisis, anxiety disorders, and often self-blame.
- You cannot live alone because it can make you stressed so that you have the potential to experience health problems in the form of hypertension or heart problems.
- If it can't be repaired, it can lead to addiction to drugs, alcohol, and eating disorders.
Couples who undergo codependent relationship may look happy from the outside. However, keep in mind that this relationship pattern is very unhealthy.
If you or your partner experience the above signs, you should immediately seek help to get out.